Check this for your nearest Starbucks

I was down in the hood smoking d’ crack
When the coppers broke in and grabbed d’sac
So I punched him d’face and told him d’rules
For coppers d aint no buffet at D’Cafe

Seriously though. D’Cafe isn’t actually a hotdog place in the Projects. Far from it. With the marble clad reception of the Dragon Hotel large enough to park a whole NBA teams’s worth of Hummers this place is more fitting to be seen drinking Crystal Champagne than chasing the dragon. With all this awe and glory and chandelier on the way in, it is slightly surprising that D’Cafe isn’t done up to the nines as well. This restaurant is simply comfortable, with a huge amount of light coming in the floor to ceiling glass walls, leaving views of the gardens outside. Coming in from busy dirty Hangda Road, the peace and simple clean lines and light of this dining room is perhaps the restaurant’s greatest success.

We had a table for 18 people booked for 11am Sunday Brunch. Traipsing in at 11 or 11.15 we were greeted by every single member of staff, of which there is a veritable gang, every which one of whom wanted to ask about the weather, enquire where I was going, say hello, Welcome, have I been the the new Dragon before that by the time I made it across the foyer and around the Veranda Restaurant to D’Cafe, I was out of breath from replying to all the pleasantries. All sweet and polite but doesn’t a nod and smile suffice?

And after all the niceties we get to business: claiming our 11am booking.
“So sorry Sir, but the restaurant doesn’t open until 11.30am,” said the receptionist
“But we have an 11am booking”
“Yes Sir, I know”
“Nobody thought to warn us that we wouldn’t be allowed into the dining room until 11.30?” Without an invitation to take a table, we sat in the hall.

Gigantic is a word that Dragon seems to have taken to heart. There is a gigantic amount of money being spent on the renovation. The hotel is gigantic with 500 rooms and 2 serviced apartment blocks; D’Cafe is gigantic; and you guessed it, the spread of food is gigantic. But it isn’t laid out very well, pretty but not very logical. And very Chinese choices to eat. Nothing wrong with that, but I was hoping for some good sunday brunch goodness. Fish bar is the best in town without a doubt, with oysters galore, huge crab legs, mussels and more. Roast beef, if you could find it nestled amongst the bread section, was pretty tasty too. There’s a parma ham to slice (mangle) yourself, a chocolate fountain and then of course all the Asian stuff. Gigantic too is the wine list, pages of it all at surprisingly low prices.

I am sure I will be back at D’Cafe. I might not choose it myself, but while there are free-flow oysters included in the 140Y set buffet, somebody will want to go.

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Panini also has a good selection of beers. Did anybody go in the evening?

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You cant really see the place as you go in the main entrances of departures. So trust me, look for the big section number signs on the huge columns holding up that amazing roof, and follow around the departures ring until you get to 14. It’s up the stairs behind you.

Bricco Cafe, Shanghai South Railway Station, departures ring section 14.

Me Too used to advertise itself as being on Lishui Road 丽水路, but nobody could find the place, so now they tell everybody they are on Jinhua Road 金华路 which makes everything much simpler. You’ll probably walk in the front into a bright conservatory style room and this is where you’ll want to sit if not full already. The big room behind, through some high arches, is a little darker, and chairs a little harder and more upright, great for a laptop. I was armed with one so that was area of choice, and in any case a mate was sat on the corner of the conservatory with a very pretty girl, and I didn’t want to disturb them. I am sure it was business…

There’s pasta on the menu, along with pizza and a load of ‘business set menus’ – you know the things, Hainan chicken and rice, black pepper fried beef over rice, probably some curry as well. I munched hungrily a bowl bolognaise spaghetti  – nothing much to write home about but tasty, and drank loads of some no-brand soda water and constant stream of delicious Illy coffee (second cup is half price). All good. Double Star got written up quickly over the fast wifi before another mate walked in (this one luckily unaccompanied) and more coffee came. It would seem that Me Too has a quite a crowd of Hangzhou north and west friends.

The place is no smoking and there are signs up ‘SShhhhh!’, so providing there is a chair spare, you can get on with work.

IFE Cafe, 418 Xixi Road | 西溪路418号

Jamaica has some pretty good eats too – the photo here doesn’t really do it justice, but this Jamaica Club Sandwich is full of cheese, pork loin and bacon, and is oozing with mayo and butter. The bread is fresh and soft with a little chew and a crisp outside. It is definitely worth the trek to Xihu Tiandi just for that. Jamaica has several other tasties on the menu, meatballs, paella pasta and some more sandwiches.

Jamaica does not seem that busy in the afternoons, although the booze on the menu may help fill the place up of an evening. Without the Quaker-ism of Starbucks etcetc, you can smoke eat and drink all at the same time. For now anyway – there is a rumour that China is going non-smoking too.

To find Jamaica, wander into Xihu Tiandi – I prefer the northern most entrance just after the Dahua Hotel and follow the lake bank to the cafe – but there are good signs all over the area.

If somebody ever gets there at night, let me know how busy it is.

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This rather new addition to the bar and restaurant scene has about 10 different names, but Vineyard sounds best, so that’s what it’s going to be on this page. Vineyard is a favourite afternoon hang-out for this office-less wannabe writer. The internet is good, the Illy coffee is really good, and there is a range of enticing stuff on the menu priced from 30Y to 200Y for a massive piece of Australian steak. The place is attached to a wine cellar showing a range of mostly Australian wines and you can drink them for the shop price in Vineyard, which is great.

When Vineyard frst opened it was a little dead, which I enjoyed as I could get on with writing banalities in peace. The owner of the bar (now ex-owner / part-owner?) owns the whole bleeding building of Zhongtian Dasha (中田大厦) and this was supposed to be a place, no doubt, that he could show his girlfriends or business buddies and demonstrate that he really is rich enough to own a place in a seriously good location and do nothing with it. Consequently, it dawdled on for while without any direction or identity.

The place looks pretty swish, designed by some mega-star designer from Oz whose name I cannot remember. Walls are in grey with purply-mauvy abstract pattern art – someone tell me that’s called – and the black wood tables are lined up every morning with a laser beam to make sure there is not the vaguest kink in the aesthetic. The lighting is so complex even the staff havent got their heads around it yet as they demonstrate well at various times of day when the light level has to be made more designer. Again.

The Western grub is always pretty good in a Hangzhou sort of way and one could never argue with the price. Lots of pizzas, sandwiches, steaks, burgers. Somebody with a sweet tooth has stocked a fridge with tonnes of Italian looking cakes and icecream.

So we have a designer looking place with good coffee, pretty good wine, non-designer food at prices for students, not much custom and pretty much no identity whatsoever. And the boss didnt notice or didnt care, or maybe even wanted it that way.

However, he probably didn’t reckon on Wade. Wade is well known in Hanghou and used to look after the laowai in In Club sometime before it became Out Club. Dont ask. Wade is filling the place up, and despite the less than perfect set-up, he has started to create quite a rocking atmosphere, no doubt largely due to his own encompassing joviality. Friday and Saturday evenings are full with party-goers coming to take in the cheap booze, live music and garden. Added to the mix are the guys that run the Hangzhou Expat 2009 page on Facebook. Lots of fun games, prizes and cheap cold beer served by the case load. If you’re after a quieter glass of wine or a seriously iced Aussie beer, maybe pop in during the week…

Day times are far more busy than before, with several people coming to steal MY internet connection.

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